Mel Robbins
The Manipulation Expert: 4 Hidden Signs You’re Dealing With a Toxic Person
In today’s episode, you’ll learn the hidden signs of a manipulative, toxic person from the #1 researcher in the world on dark personalities, Dr. Leanne ten Brinke, PhD.
She is here to teach you how to spot the poisonous people that are hidden in plain sight around you - in your family, your community, and at work.
And, she’s giving you the science-backed guide to understand poisonous people: how they operate, how to spot the patterns early, and what to do when you realize you’re dealing with one.
Dr. ten Brinke is a professor at the University of British Columbia, where she directs the Truth and Trust Lab and has spent nearly two decades studying trust, deception, manipulation, and dark personality traits.
She wants to make one thing perfectly clear: most people are good.
But one poisonous person can create an enormous amount of stress, confusion, and pain.
This episode will help you recognize the pattern, trust what you’re seeing, neutralize their behavior, and know exactly what to do when you’re around them.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
-How to spot dark personality traits of narcissism, psychopathy, Machiavellianism, and sadism in daily life
-The #1 sign you’re being manipulated
-What gaslighting is, what it is not, and what to do when you’re being gaslit
-Why many toxic people seem charming at first
-How gossip can reveal a manipulative personality at work
-The simple ways to become more strategic instead of more emotional when dealing with difficult people
After listening, you will know exactly what to do to spot toxic behavior, handle manipulative people, and take back your peace and power.
For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page: https://www.melrobbins.com/episode/episode-416/
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I’m just your friend. I am not a licensed therapist, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Got it? Good. I’ll see you in the next episode.
In this episode:
00:00 Meet the Guest
02:31 Why Toxic People Are So Harmful
09:10 The Four “Dark Personality” Traits
12:55 Hidden Signs of a Sociopath: What to Look For
21:26 What a Machiavellian Personality Looks Like
31:45 The Easiest Way To Spot A Narcissist in Your Life
38:03 How to Spot a Sadist and What To Do
44:14 How to Tell if Someone is a Psychopath or Just a Bad Person
45:15 Spot A Toxic Person in 10 Seconds
49:21 Why People With Toxic Traits Are Often in Powerful Positions
50:42 What Is Gaslighting And How To Spot It
53:09 Why Narcissists and Toxic People Don't Change
59:31 How to Protect Your Peace & Take Back Your Power
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Published Jul 20, 2026
